As you are entering this brand-new reading adventure, you will soon realize the hidden content of this story. A story about a little girl that was never wronged, abused, beaten but was somehow left scarred. A girl that had successful parents who wanted the best for her but is the best from our parents really what we need? A personal story with trials and tribulations and how did that all end up with a successful Social Media Marketer? How did this shy girl from the past end up delivering her own personal (and business) blog where she is opening up to the world?
Two successful parents in the restaurant business, Switzerland, kindergarten, a small girl – a recipe for a happy childhood one might think but is it? Having parents sending her to boarding school for 4 years as they wanted “the best for her” is not the parenting love that every child needs. Not speaking the native language in this part of the country (German) in kindergarten has definitely left her out of the social circles in a very important age. Not communicating properly with the other kids meant that she will be on the sidelines for all activities. And while grown-ups have been thought that they should not make fun of others, kids don’t follow the same path – especially when they see a girl that doesn’t speak their language and has a chubby body that doesn’t fit their expectations.
Can this really scar someone? You might think to yourself about all kids growing up with nothing and how scarred they would become and you will be right. Can this story really be that painful? Can it cost permanent damage? The youth of the girl only scratches the surface of destructive childhoods and she should feel thankful for everything that she had – and she is. Gratitude was a key factor in the reversal of the story but more of it later.
The girl’s past is a classic case of bullying and scars – nothing outside of the norm for most people – but only those who had felt anything close to it will understand the social impact it can have on a person. What are the consequences? What can it mean? What can it do?
We are all thought that if we want something we should just go get it, right? We hear this magic formula everywhere – from inspirational books to Gary V’s podcasts. It gets branded into our minds that everything we want is just a step away and all we need to do is just go after it and claim it. When you have been socially shy all your life it’s a bit different, isn’t it? The girl was not a part of conversations, plans, birthday parties, so how would she know how to act? Her parents were often not there to show her. Boarding school is anything but useful, so one might think that she was born this way – shy from the beginning, so where is the harm? Naming someone as an “introvert” is a great way to take away responsibility and to claim that he or she was just “born” shy and there is nothing we can and should do.
The 7-year-old version of the girl was a part of a theater group, having several shows in front of decent audiences – she did not feel ashamed then. Later she was even in the newspaper with a show that they performed – no shyness there.
The girl is now talking to strangers constantly; she enjoys getting to know people on a regular basis, has started teaching Social Media, and has numerous presentations in front of dozens of successful Marketers.
So how long is the process of overcoming these odds? How long is the road that one needs to cover? Are there any shortcuts and is there a success formula that will get you to the place you want to be in?
The Long Road Back
If you can relate to her story and you were waiting for a magical pill or a formula that can get you out of that space, sorry to disappoint. There is no one specific road to cover. We are all different; we have all been through our personal situations leaving us with scars of our own. We must all find our way back but there might be some shortcuts hidden – getting ideas and copying people who have accomplished what we want from life. Success leaves clues, so find someone you admire and study them. Get a book, read articles or follow blogs like this one, especially if you are interested in Social Media and life itself.
The gratitude mentioned before was the initial step for her recovery. Yes, it sounds boring and it might be a cliché but the power of it is uncanny – nothing can compare with the true nature of a real gratitude felt. Imagine it, write it down, believe it and it will change your world.
Growing up, learning the native language, getting around more and more people and actually showing interest in their lives are what followed. People can talk about themselves for ages if you let them and it’s the best way to be close to someone. The path is full of surprises but it gets easier every day. Most importantly, this walk never stops. The road is long and goes until the end of our lives. One never stops learning and improving. Once she realized this, it changed her life. She is not waiting for a specific milestone saying “congratulations, you made it to the end and you are now a successful person, you have overcome your shyness, and you can lie down and stop”. The road is the success story. There are some checkpoints she has seen and there are many more to be seen – they serve as reality checks, showing us if we are on the right path if we have steered left or right or if we need to make adjustments in our course. This is her course and yes, she is me.